Life has its own stages. Stages of joy and those of remorse. Often times we keep those happy memories closer to heart because they make us smile. Most of the nights we keep picturing those happy moments such that nights seem as seconds, and not long hours of sleepy states. That day your partner mentions those words of proposal for marriage just unwraps the doors of joy. When people are married it does not mean they wont face problems.
We were raised up in different families and from different cultural believes, so misunderstandings will always be there. But whatever the case I dont think there is a problem without a solution that people should even divorce, if you say some problems cannot be solved I totally disagree with you. People often fight in their marriages because they lack Respect for each other, and some lack proper Communication skills.
How is respect and communication so important in your marriage?
Married people should learn to respect and love one another. Thus, wives respect your husbands because they are heads of the house and husbands too should love and respect their wives.
However communication is very important, if you keep communicating to each other you will learn how to treat your marriage mates. Consider your spouse as your best friend, do you know what best friends do? Best friends do not keep secretes from each other, they share everything together.
If share your problems with your mates, you most assured that you would find solutions for them. Avoid everything that can put your marriage at stake. Some of the issues involve: Constant arguing; Infidelity; Bitter speech; and Resentment, among others.
CONSTANT ARGUING
Constant arguing can adversely affect your marriage. What can you do if you keep arguing with your spouse? First you need to find out why you and your spouse argue so much and then with an open mind discuss what was the matter, thereafter apologise to each other and considered it settled. Though some people find it very difficult to say SORRY, but you cant lose anything by saying sorry, can you?
INFIDELITY (unfaithfulness)
What you can do: Be honest with one another and work as a team. Make it obvious to others that you are completely committed to your mate. Consider your mates feelings and end any relationship that would make your mate unconfutable.
THE OTHER THING IS TO AVOID BITTER SPEECH
When you have misunderstandings avoid hurtful spech because words can hit harder than fists.
If tempers are beginning to flare and speech is getting out of hand it can be better to postpone the discussion , the best thing you can is to walk away from a heated argument until when the discussion can be handled calmly.
RESENTMENT
Resentment can destroy a marriage because it undermines the qualities upon which a marriage should be built, including love, trust and loyalty.
WHAT YOU CAN DO
Resentment is a choice, so is forgiveness. Not every offense needs to be discussed, sometimes you cansimply have your say in your heart and let it go, you need to realize that resentment can do more damage to your health and your marriage than the offense itself.
Change begins with you! Lets learn to solve problems.
THANK YOU MAY GOD BLESS US!
Written by: EUNICE BANDA a registered nurse student at Fountain of Peace College of Health Sciences, Petauke Zambia.
And
Dalitso Maseko ED for SZI
